Cruising for some common sensitivity

So Tom Cruise has been dropped from Paramount due to his off the wall behavior in his personal life. No suprises there then.
I lost all respect for Tom Cruise the day he appeared on Parkinson chat show a couple of years ago, and criticised parents who medicate their kids for behavior problems. He more recently had a go at poor Brooke Shields for taking medication to treat her post natal depression.
Firstly what does he know, does he live with ADHD. Well I suppose that point is open for discussion colleagues believe he displays many signs, although I think its plain ignorance. Its so easy to be critical, much easier to pass the buck. Those of us who make the decision to medicate, don't do this lightly, I know I didn't and still beat myself up about it. Yet the evidence is there before us. This morning I waved off a group of our teenagers on their way to Drayton Manor Park, for a residential trip. Without medication many of those teenagers with ADHD would be unable to cope with the whole process. It accesses a world to them that otherwise is alien. I truly believe my own son would have seriously damaged himself in the early days with his pure impulsiveness. We as parents don't do this for an easy life. we do it to give our kids a chance to be the way society expect them to be.
Of course Tom Cruise is influenced by Scientology. My only encounter with a Scientologist once was enough. His beliefs left no space to hear our point of view. He openly told me that medicating our children was wrong and that we needed to change our parenting. I invitied him to a coffee morning and suggested that we leave medication off for him so he could see the children at their most energetic. He never showed up!.

Alex and the Monsoon drain

So as our adventures come to a close in Malaysia, Alex as in any true ADHD style, couldn't do what most Malaysians seem to do at some time in their life and that is to fall down a monsoon drain.
Suffering with swimmers ear as well which resulted in a bad ear infection 2 days before we were due to fly, a badly cut leg and a damaged ego, we visited a very efficient doctor of my sisters.
We waited all of 2 minutes to be seen and then went through Alex's ailments in great detail. She somehow didn't seem too surprised when I told her of his ADHD. After a painful session with iodine and water, Alex's leg looked a lot better. We then waited for another 2 minutes while the prescription was prepared, by the resident pharmacist. The cost, as this was a private clinic (no NHS in Malaysia) was a mere £10.00. Where are we going wrong. I would pay that not to have the hastle of having to hand prescriptions in, hang around and then have to go back and pick it up.

Alex is now on the mend and able to fly back home.

It has been an incredible holiday and I would thank you for putting up with my memoirs during our time away. I have had excellent guidance from my sister who has taught me all about bloggs and how brill they can be so thanks Sharon.
I also wanted to thank Malaysia for being so tolerant, welcoming and treating us like royalty while we were there. It will be hard to adapt back to cold and wet UK , however I do miss my cup of tea!

See you back in the UK

Thank you Pudsey Bear

Every year as I settle down to watch children in need I, as most viewers do, enjoy the entertainment from the soap opera stars and various artists who help raise millions of pounds for needy children.
As I filled in the huge application form earlier this year, to continue our work with drama therapy, I found as with most bids, its sometimes really hard to keep the emotion out of the application. The form needs to be objective, professional and full of relevant imformation. How hard it can be sometimes, when all we want is just a bit of cash to continue providing the services we know make a difference.
When I went off to Malaysia, I left very clear instructions with the team back home that I needed to know if the bid had been successful, and I am delighted to say it was.
So why drama? I suppose its one way of reaching the hard to reach children, who are too young to change with anger management, yet need some specialist help in coping with social situations that often lead them into trouble. The sessions are client led and often lead to loads of emotions and feelings being released that may have been suppressed for sometime. The kids often leave the sessions, very angry or upset and I initially felt very concerned. Now I know that this is exactly what is should be doing and the kids over the weeks that follow are able to let go of all the awful feelings they have been holding on,through all the negatives they struggle with on a daily basis. Katie our therapist has been such a find and is very passionate about the difference it makes.
So thanks Pudsey bear we will be carrying on our good work for another year!

A rumble in the jungle

Set off early last week to start an adventure at Taman Negara, which is one of the oldest rainforests in existence today. I have to admit I'm a bit of a save the world and care about the environment sort of person and the children constantly poke fun at me. Well this little trip was to show them how beautiful our rainforests can be and how important it is that we care for the world we live in.
Arrived for our boat journey and prepared ourselves with lifejackets for what looked to be 3 hours of anxious scary travel. The boat jetty looked like it would sink once we all got on board, no seats, you sat on the floor and prayed there were no crocs in the water. The journey was incredible and spotting the wild animals as we went along was pretty magnificent, wild boar, monkeys and kingfishers to name a few. We were greeted by our guide who was amazing, and a huge thanks goes to his knowledge and expertise as well as his enduring patience with Alex's unending questions.
After dinner we had our first experience of walking in the rainforest spotting all the insects that had come to life, Lauren and I huddled together in fear as we passed tranchillas and other scary insects.
An early start the next morning led us to a huge trek up the which was pretty challenging, especially for us oldies! but magnificent views made it very worthwhile.

Once completed we headed for the canopy walk. How fooled we were. We all imagined it was one canopy, one walk. How wrong could we be! There were 10 canopys, each getting higher as we went along and as high as a 23 storey building. At this point I must mention that it is advisable never to be the one to follow a child with ADHD on such a walk. Alex swung, moonwalked, and bounced up and down, it was probably one of the most scary moments of my life!!!.

After a well deserved lunch we next approached an ear cave, which I am pleased to say both Sharon, Lauren and myself bowed out of. Headed by Megan (our youngest, age 10) who has absolutely no fear and followed by Michael, Alex and our guide, Rusli.They appeared sometime later completely covered in bat pooh and stunk of ammonia. They did all say it was absolutely amazing though.
Alex also at that point had decided to throw up in the cave, much to the delight of the fruit bats as he had consumed rather a lot of melon at lunch.
That was their dinner sorted out!

A moving experience for us all later in the day was spending some time with an aborigine settlement. They have traded with the tour guides, that for a small fee, they would allow us time in their camp and they would demonstrate some of the traditional ways of their survival. This works well for everyone as the Malaysians are aware there are so few of these tribes left in Malaysia and a small income from the tourists helps them buy simple foods and luxuries.

We rounded the afternoon off with a boat trip on the rapids in a jetty boat and we all just dived into the water afterwards, wow it felt good!

Update you all later

Turtles in Cherating

I suppose y0u are all wondering what turtles in Cherating has to do with ADHD, not a lot really, just a wonderful experience that I would like to share with you.
Set off for Cherating on the South China Sea on Monday and arrived to the lapping sounds of the sea. The hotel was huge, very friendly and the food great. Our view overlooked the sea which was a deserted beach, pure heaven.
Spent 5 days eating, sleeping, sunbathing and doing absolutely nothing, what a treat.
The kids well, Lauren sunbathed and gave all the Malay men a treat (not used to seeing semi naked women wiht curves) as predominetly a Muslim country. The highlight of her week was when 300 US Marines arrived for the day.
Alex befriended everyone, did acrobatics in the swimming pool, fished, flew kites with sister, eat non stop, swam, and decided he wanted to stay for one year. Megan, did all of that and charmed everyone with her dancing in the evening in a huge green skirt. She even joined the band on stage to sing Macarena.
We ate Lobster, crab, king prawns, squid all in one evening, wow was it good.

Just down the road, was a turtle sanctuary. Abu remembers as a kid there always being huge turtles on the beach. Unfortunately as time has gone on these beautiful creatures are becoming extinct. The sanctuary collects the eggs of the few turtles that come and incubate them till they have hatched and are about a week old. Many of the eggs are eaten by other wildlife otherwise.The turtles are then released back into the sea. Only 1% of these baby turtles survive, and the survivors then swim round the world for the next 30 years and return to the same beach where they were born to lay their eggs. How do they know they are on the right beach? They recognise the sound of the sea.
On our last night we were invited to release the baby turtles into the sea. What we needed to do was to be silent, no cameras, or any kind of disturbance.
Just before releasing them Club Med next door decided to let off fireworks. The noise can disorientate the baby turtles. We all felt extemely cross that such an activity can take place next to such important enviormental work. Anyway we all went to the beach when it was calm and each held a baby turtle and allowed them to make their way into the ocean. Certainly one of the most moving moments of my life and the kiddies.

We are now back at Sharons and have just been for dim sum at the Hilton Hotel, cost nine english pounds each to eat food you only dream about, in five star quality. Alex was a trouper and eat a whole baby octypus, oysters (ladies watch out in the future) and jelly fish.

If I put my ADHD hat on for a moment, then Malaysia is a very non judgemental place to be. Not once has anyone remarked on my hyper kid, who does have his moments. Maybe the culture is much more relaxed here than at home, where I would be very scared at exposing Alex to a 5 star hotel restaurant.

Please do feel free to leave any comments on the blog, would love to hear from any of you out there. (just click on comments) very easy.

Will return with new adventures soon I'm sure.

Banana Leaf in Bangsar

Settling in to the very laid back and gastronomic Malaysia. Yeterday morning I draggged big sister off to Body pump at her gym, of which she still hasn't forgiven me, shw cannot even gain the arm strengh to lift her cup of tea. Meanwhile Michael took the rest of the tribe to the swimming pool.
Arrived back to find Megan and Alex very wrinkly and sunbunt. The only cure for that was a trip to Bangsar to eat dinner off a banana leaf. Our luck was in as the All blacks won the rugby against the Aussies, which meant dinner was on Abu.
The food was fantastic, and again let me highlight how eating curry and rice at 10pm at night with only your hands and at three english pounds per person is what dreams are made of for the ADHD kid in the family.
Do they have a problem in Malaysia with ADHD, I am on a mission to find out and see if I can discover anything.

Does anyone have any info on this. All you bloggers out there, feel free to update me.

Tomorrow we head off to a beautiful beach for 5 days, cant wait.

Hope weather is still good in the U.K

Therese

Travels to Malaysia

Hi Everyone

This entry is dedicated to Laraine who has patiently waited for this blog to be updated.
Thank you for your patience.
Travelling to Malaysia with the family can be stressful at the best of times, however even more so when one of the kids has ADHD. The preperation beforehand was the same as preparing for a military invasion and included thinking of every scenario possible.
So here goes sharing my travel tips and things that I found really useful.

Tip 1 If your ADHD child is on ritalin and you are planning on leaving the U.K for a long holiday, check that the medication you are taking out does not exceed 900mg. If it does, you will need a certificate from the home office. If you download a copy from the internet www.homeoffice.com and follow the instructions, which are pretty foolproof. Remember to be safe you need to allow at least two weeks for this. Why all this fuss? well ritalin is a controlled drug and the last thing you want is to end up in some prison cell because no one believes your not planning to sell it on arrival.

Tip 2 Take a night flight/cruise or train journey, our kids do tend to be more quieter late at night, generally and this is always the hope they may sleep for a short while.

Tip 3 If you can afford it, book the lounge at the airport while waiting for your flight, the calming effect of leather sofas, tranquil music and the availability of free snacks and drinks can have a wonderful effect on your hyper child. The distractions and noise at the airport can be an absolute nightmare. For a family of five it cost around ninety pounds, which we all agreed was worth every penny.

Tip 4 Request seats with legroom if possible, that may mean getting to the airport early, this again makes the lounge such good value. Preferably have another family member in front so that if they constantly kick the seat, its only someone who's used to it going to be driven mad and not some unsuspecting passenger hoping for a peaceful flight.


So why visit Malaysia.

Personally for me, I have a sister Sharon and her husband Abu who live out there. It was important for us to make the journey and experience their life as well as visit a very special country which I can only describe as one of the most beautiful places on earth. (the shops are pretty good too).
I have spent a few hours attending her creative writing course for beginners and am really taken with the nuturing and care that each of her students receive. It allowed me to reflect on what we try and offer on our 'Living with ADHD course" in that we need to work with people at the place that they are at and not dictate and criticise. It was wonderful living proof that we all need to develop ourselves and feel that we are doing a good job with the knowledge that we have, be it writing a story or listening to our child.

What works for my son Alex out here, firstly the food, available 24hrs a day, all his favourites ands so cheap he can eat to his hearts content. A meal out followed by a take away to keep him going through the night would be a rare treat in the U.K, here it costs pennies.
A climate that encourages sleep in the day and play at night, also works and an uncle who loves rugby and English football.

See you all another day with more stories to make you jealous.

Therese